7 Oktober 1996/2007

"Ibu, why you're looking so gloomy?"
"Ibu, are you exhausted?"
"Ibu, you're looking worried...."
Pertanyaan2 dan pernyataan tersebut Hanif ungkapkan dengan penuh perhatian bahkan kadang dengan muka penuh kekhawatiran.

****

"Ibu....mau ke kamar Hanif ngga?"
"Ada apa sayang..?"
"I want to talk to you" or sometimes, "There's something I need to discuss"
"Di sini aja kenapa Nak?"
"I want to keep it only between you and me"
Klo sudah begitu itu tandanya dia mau curhat. Dan klo dia curhat dia ga mau ayahnya denger, sayapun ga boleh ngebocorin apa yang dia curhatkan ke ayahnya ;-)
Bahagia sekali ketika selesai dia curhat dan setelah saya ngasih 'masukkan' (which is mostly in the form of 'long-lecture' and more often than not some tears involved ;-D), lantas dia bilang,
"Hati Hanif lega sekarang, Ibu...."
Ah...anakku....
****

Best of all is:
"Ibu, you're the best mother I've ever had..." (oh my...langsung melayang ke negri di awan ngga siiih....)
"Tapi Ibu kan galak sama Hanif..."
"Hmmm...engga koook...engga terlalu..." jawabnya dengan tersipu2
****

That's my Hanif, my first-born, my no-longer-best-little boy (he's my best BIG boy now...;-)). He's growing up into a sensitive, care pre-teen. Bahkan sejak dia kecil saya sudah 'curiga' klo Hanif ini punya perasaan yang halus, sangat perasa dan sensitif. Namun saya tidak menyangka klo dia kemudian bisa begitu care dengan perasaan orang lain, terutama perasaan saya ibunya. It's probably because he's a sensitive person to begin with. Alhamdulillaah I've never viewed sensitivity as a personality flaw or weakness and I don't want Hanif to view it that way either.

Hanif Ahmad Kautsar Djunaedy, lahir di Bandung tanggal 7 Oktober 1996, hari ini usianya genap 11 tahun. 11 TAHUN...?? ya 11 tahun...! Subhanallaah, walhamdulillaah. Saya sendiri rasanya masih tidak percaya my best little boy sudah bukan little boy lagi sekarang. Tidak percaya saya punya anak yang sudah hampir baligh. Oh my...where were I...where have I been?? Kemudian dalam hatipun timbul ungkapan2 klasik: rasanya baru kemaren saya lahirkan dia, rasanya baru kemaren saya toilet trained dia, baru kemaren pertama masuk sekolah, dan 'baru kemaren-baru kemaren' yang lainnya. How fast time flies.....And then I realize something, what have I done for him so far?

My dear Hanif, my son, my jewel, my qurrotaa'yun,
I was thinking of you today,
when I realized that I haven't told you in a while
how wonderful it is to have you for a son...

Sometimes, of course, I worry about you,
but that's just a natural part of being a parent.
More often,
I think about how special you are,
and how much joy your cheerfulness and willlingness to help out
have added to my life...

I may have criticized you at times,
I may have tried at times to change you,
but I love you just the way you are...
and the way you are makes me very proud.
( unknown author)

Happy birthday my baby, my best little boy. We'll always love you and be there for you, insya Allah

(Note: It took me one whole month to eventually post this entry. Sorry for the delay. I simply didn't feel like MPing these last few weeks ;-))